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The Do’s and Don’ts of Divorce: Avoiding Common Pitfalls

Brazil Clark, PLLC Sept. 16, 2025

Divorce is never easy, but thoughtful decision-making can help reduce stress and support a better outcome. Understanding the key actions to take—and those to avoid—is especially important when children, assets, and emotional ties are involved.

Working with Brazil Clark, PLLC offers clarity during a difficult time. Their approach to family law matters prioritizes clear communication, practical strategies, and attention to each client’s goals. Whether addressing custody arrangements, division of property, or long-term planning, Brazil Clark, PLLC supports clients with a steady and informed legal presence. Contact the firm today.

Do Prioritize Communication With Your Attorney

Open, honest communication with legal counsel helps keep a case on track. Clients should provide all relevant information from the beginning, including financial records, details about children, and prior legal issues. This allows the attorney to offer appropriate legal guidance throughout the divorce process.

Frequent check-ins and timely responses to questions or document requests are equally important. A clear channel of communication can help reduce missteps that might lead to delays or unfavorable outcomes.

Don’t Hide Assets or Withhold Information

It may be tempting to conceal bank accounts, property, or income, but this can backfire. Courts take financial transparency seriously. If one party is found to have hidden assets, it can negatively affect custody arrangements, property division, and credibility in court.

A fair outcome depends on accurate information. Disclosing all financial records, debts, and ownership stakes gives both sides a more solid foundation to proceed. Concealment often leads to additional court time, legal fees, and stress.

Do Keep the Children’s Best Interests First

When children are involved, decisions must reflect what serves their emotional and physical well-being. Tennessee courts focus on the interests of the child when determining custody and parenting plans. Parents should avoid involving children in disputes or using them as messengers.

Instead, they should work together—even if communication is strained—to create a parenting plan that provides stability and structure. Prioritizing respectful co-parenting can reduce emotional strain for both the children and the adults involved.

Don’t Use Children to Gain Leverage

It’s not uncommon for one parent to attempt to influence custody outcomes by casting the other in a negative light. This can be damaging to the children and is often viewed unfavorably by the court. Attempting to manipulate custody in this way can compromise long-term parenting rights.

Parents should avoid speaking negatively about one another in front of their children. Maintaining healthy boundaries helps create a more secure environment and prevents further emotional strain.

Do Organize and Document Everything

Divorce involves substantial paperwork. Everything from tax returns and pay stubs to mortgage documents and retirement accounts should be collected and organized early in the process. This helps reduce delays and improves the attorney’s ability to build a strong legal position.

Clients should:

  • Keep digital and physical copies of important documents

  • Save email and text communication related to custody or finances

  • Maintain a written record of interactions related to parenting responsibilities

Being organized makes it easier to respond to court deadlines and unexpected requests for information.

Don’t Rely Solely on Verbal Agreements

Verbal promises about custody schedules, financial support, or property division often lead to disputes later. These types of agreements can be misinterpreted or forgotten. A signed, legally binding agreement provides clarity and helps enforce accountability.

Relying on written records helps prevent misunderstandings and gives both parties peace of mind that the terms will be followed.

Do You Know Why Family Law Matters in Tennessee

Each state has its own rules regarding divorce. In Tennessee, family law covers issues like child custody, alimony, property division, and parenting plans. An attorney familiar with local court procedures in Nashville and Rutherford County can provide legal direction tailored to those jurisdictions.

How family law applies in Tennessee is important when preparing for court proceedings, mediation sessions, or negotiations. Rules about equitable distribution and custody arrangements may differ from what someone expects, especially if they’ve gone through a divorce in another state.

Don’t Ignore Court Orders or Deadlines

Failure to comply with court instructions can result in serious consequences. This might include loss of custody, fines, or unfavorable rulings. Courts expect both parties to follow all deadlines for filing, appearances, and documentation.

If a requirement changes and it becomes difficult to meet, communication with legal counsel should happen immediately. Judges may be more flexible when good faith efforts are made, but they often respond negatively to avoidable noncompliance.

Do Stay Focused on Long-Term Goals

Divorce can stir up emotional responses, but making decisions out of frustration or spite can lead to regret. It’s better to consider the bigger picture, including financial stability, the children’s well-being, and emotional recovery.

Long-term thinking means compromising when it’s beneficial and letting go of small battles that aren’t worth the emotional toll. This mindset can shorten the divorce process and improve post-divorce life.

Don’t Let Emotions Dictate Legal Strategy

Strong feelings are normal during divorce, but they shouldn’t override sound judgment. Trying to prolong litigation or "win" every disagreement can increase legal costs and strain relationships with children or co-parents.

Family law attorneys help clients focus on achieving stable outcomes rather than escalating arguments. While it’s important to stand up for one’s interests, it’s also critical to know when to step back and prioritize resolution over retribution.

Do Work Toward a Fair Division of Property

Tennessee applies an equitable distribution model when dividing assets. This means the court looks for a fair, not necessarily equal, division of property. Spouses should identify shared and individual property, then work toward an agreement that reflects their contributions and needs.

A few considerations that impact property division include:

  • Length of the marriage

  • Each spouse’s financial contributions

  • Value of retirement accounts and pensions

  • Responsibility for debts

It helps to approach this process with transparency and a willingness to find a middle ground.

Don’t Overlook the Impact of Debt

Dividing marital property also means dividing marital debt. Failing to account for joint credit cards, car loans, or mortgages can lead to disputes later. It’s important to review all liabilities and discuss how they’ll be handled post-divorce.

If possible, paying down joint debts before finalizing the divorce can simplify matters. At the very least, agreements should clearly state who is responsible for each debt moving forward.

Do Protect Credit and Financial Independence

During divorce, shared accounts can become a source of tension. To avoid financial disruption, individuals should monitor their credit reports, close joint accounts when appropriate, and begin establishing credit in their own name.

Financial planning is just as important as legal planning. It lays the groundwork for a stable transition into single life.

Don’t Rush Into New Commitments

Some people feel pressure to move on quickly after a divorce. Whether it’s entering a new relationship, relocating, or making large purchases, these decisions can affect custody outcomes or financial settlements.

It’s better to focus on finalizing the divorce first. Once the legal and emotional dust has settled, there’s more clarity to make personal decisions with confidence.

Do Choose Legal Support That Understands Family Law

A lawyer who regularly handles family law matters can offer insight based on prior experience in Tennessee courts. From child custody and parenting plans to asset division and post-divorce modifications, legal support plays a key role in helping clients move forward.

Individuals in Nashville and Rutherford County should work with someone familiar with the procedures and expectations of local courts. That experience helps keep the process organized and outcomes fair.

Don’t Take Advice from Non-Legal Sources

Well-meaning friends and family often share their own divorce stories. But no two cases are the same. Advice from those without legal training can create confusion or false expectations.

Legal decisions should always be guided by someone trained in family law. What worked for one person may not apply in another situation.

Make an Informed Decision and Avoid Costly Mistakes

Divorce is full of emotional and legal decisions. Understanding the do’s and don’t’s can help individuals avoid missteps and move toward a more secure future. By focusing on communication, documentation, and the best interests of any children involved, divorcing spouses can reduce tension and make progress.

Legal guidance is especially important when dealing with child custody, asset division, and long-term planning. For those in Nashville and Rutherford County, Brazil Clark, PLLC provides legal support rooted in Tennessee family law. Reach out to Brazil Clark, PLLC today to discuss your divorce case.